I never thought that some people would consider being in a relationship as a meat-and-potatoes issue. Not until I went for college and got a seat in one of the college hostels. Freshmen year in Indian medical college hostels can give you gritty gyps during the first few months before initiation. After which life just gets better, or worse depending on the people you live with. The initial three months are worst, during which one certain statement strikes me. One senior or the other starts or end up asking “Do you have a girlfriend?” It didn’t occur to me first but I later came to know that we were supposed to say a very convincing “Yes” and just make up the rest of the story howsoever you want. Ignorant as I was, I told the truth as I do not have a girlfriend during that time. Honestly, I thought the whole fresher thing was more than enough for me to handle! But the next question was worse: “Why don’t you have a girlfriend? Are you gay?”

   From then on, I thought I should have a girlfriend, and subsequently got one. Anyway, turns out almost every guy in the hostel was in a relationship. So, in a way, being in a relationship was kind of a peer pressure, not only for me, but for all guys staying together in the same hostel; and some would go to the extent of boasting about it especially when they got a beautiful one. At the same time comes the danger of having a girlfriend every guy in the hostel would hit on; jealousy is a bitter ingredient especially when you’re no match against a senior.

   Anyway, relationships, or rather pre-marital romance, are a normal thing. Break-ups happen often. We hook up with someone, because of one reason or the other we part ways; and then the next person comes, and then goes. Ultimately we get married, life goes on. Some point in life makes you wonder: it is not that all pre-marital romances end up in marriage, so what’s the point in having one? Some would say that relationships are a good thing, because at one point or the other such relationships end up in marriage. Some control-freak parents would even go to the extent of arranging for their kids. I guess it depends on personal issues and preference as to have relationships or not.

   Relationships goes right back to the ‘social animal’ thing. No one wants to be alone; we surround ourselves with family, friends, colleagues, and also a lover. Everything that we do is a result of our endless search for happiness. Romance is a close, usually short relationship of love between two people. Relationships are supposed to make us happy. It happens when two people meet and fall in love with each other, or at least think that they’re in love. It is the meeting of two people to know each other better, to understand each other, to get closer to each other, to be emotionally related to each other. Love yields happiness, the love we share in a relationship give us a happy life. The joie de vivre in a relationship is the knowledge that the one you’re in love with loves you just the same. The harmony in a relationship is the trust you have on each other no matter the distance life puts you afar.

   But there are a lot of heartbreaks and hurts in relationships. Relationships nowadays cause us more misery than the happiness it is meant to represent. Why is this so? What went wrong? Relationships happen between two people on account of those two people and for those two people, so in a way I guess we can say: what happened to us that we often so hurt ourselves and the person next to us?


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